When Can You Say You're from Chicago? - A Guide to Suburbs that get a pass
- Joey McDermott
- 5 days ago
- 4 min read
Updated: 4 days ago
I crossed Illinois' northern border to attend college. Despite being a Bears fan, the cheese state was good to me. I ate cheese curds, discovered Culver's frozen custard, learned the chicken dance, ate a supper club wedge salad, covered shifts during deer hunting season and reached a détente with Packer fans. Despite my cultural appropriations and assimilation, everywhere I went, I told people, “I’m from Chicago.”
There weren’t a lot of us from the city, but whenever I met someone my face lit up - excited to have a taste of home. “So, you’re from Chicago? I am too. Where did you go to high school?”
That’s when the hesitation started and they sensed trouble, “Oh you mean like downtown Chicago? Nobody’s actually from downtown.” To suburbanites, the city is only downtown.
“Me, neither,” as a Chicagoan I know there’s 76 official community areas- other than the Loop. And as the natives do, I gave them an intersection. “I’m from Fullerton and Kimball - Logan Square.” And finished it with a neighborhood.
“Oh, you mean the city-city?”
“Yes, that’s why I say I'm from Chicago - So where are you actually from?”
“I’m from (Carol Stream, Highland Park, Naperville, etc.) ...I go downtown all the time.”
“Really?" Like most city dwellers, "I barely go downtown."
“Well I’m only 30 minutes away, so it's easy.”
“Hold up, I’m 30 minutes away. After traffic and looking for parking - it’s more like 40 minutes.”
“Dude, why are you making such a big deal about this?”
Now that’s the question of the hour! Why did we make such a big deal about it? There’s so many reasons.
My block had teenagers who attended a dozen different high schools. My friends from high school lived in Rogers Park, Humboldt Park and Hyde Park. I took the CTA all over the city and waited in line to get a job with the park district.
I knew the precinct captain was the answer to any problem and when I wanted candy - the store had a sign that said, "Food and Liquor."
Finally, I met a suburbanite with a sense of decency and decorum. Upon meeting me they proclaimed, “I’m from the Chicagoland area - Cicero, Illinois.” I loved that they led with Chicagoland and then proudly proclaimed their suburb, with the state’s name after it. A clear distinction, and in many ways they had more right to claim Chicago than any of the other perpetrators and posers.
That led me to ponder, are there suburbs that can claim the right to be Chicagoans? If so, how would that be determined? That lead me to create the following list - ten ways to determine if your suburb is like the city:
You can’t have a street lined with driveways and attached garages. Next you’re gonna have a cul-de-sac. This also includes any lack of sidewalks and a mailbox that’s on the curb. Nothing screams suburbia more than these, all of which are automatic disqualifiers.
In Chicago, we have alleys. This is where children find a safe space to congregate with others, play basketball on a crate and play football from telephone pole to telephone pole. The alley is the heartbeat of Chicago youth cultural life.
If you’re accessible on the CTA train lines. Perhaps then we can give you a pass. That means places like Evanston, Oak Park, Cicero and Skokie.
If you have taverns with apartments above them, and not inside a strip mall. Someplace where you have to parallel park. Also, if it’s a longtime business, cash only and they allows you to bring your own pizza into the joint.
Your edifice must be located on a lot that’s narrow and runs long, like the typical 30 by 120 foot lot in the city. The space between these narrow lots is known as a gangway. This is where one runs to evade gangsters or the police. It's also known to host the occasional dice game.
The housing must have some bungalows, the octagonal type with the little window on the second floor. This is the typical home of police, fire fighters and city workers. OR you must have some two flats - the ones where grandma lives on one floor and her married child lives above.
The street grid system must be in effect, where it’s a major street every half mile and you refer to the hundred number of the block. For example:
-The north/south streets in Elmwood Park have numbers from the grid. That means 73rd street is one block west of Harlem, which is 7200 west.
-Another example is Madison Avenue, it runs through Oak Park, Forrest Park and Maywood.
Colorful politicians, and they have to be called a mayor! Not a town manager or village president. The more corrupt the better, Hello Dalton and Cicero! We like you.
If you’re a suburb on the edge of the city and everyone claims they moved from a city neighborhood on the edge. For example
-Mexicans from Little Village moving to Cicero
-Italians from Grand Avenue moving to Elmwood Park and Melrose Park
-Jews moving from West Rogers Park to Skokie
-South Asians moving from Devon Avenue to Lincolnwood
If you have a destination that attracts people from the city. For example:
-Places to eat like Johnnie’s Beef in Elmwood Park, Kaufman’s Bagels in Skokie or White Eagle Banquets in Niles.
-Malls like North Riverside Mall, Old Orchard in Skokie, Harlem and Irving Plaza in Norridge or Evergreen Plaza in Evergreen Park.
-Places to gamble like Horseshoe Casino in Hammond, IN or Rivers Casino in Des Plaines. The old horse tracks like Arlington Park (Arlington Hts.), Maywood Park (Actually located in Melrose Park) or Hawthorne Park (Cicero).
-Places of worship like the Shrine to Our Lady of Guadalupe in Des Plaines or the Bahai Temple in Wilmette.
-Parks like the Swallow Creek stairs in Palos Park, Brookfield Zoo, Cook County Forrest Preserve's Cermak Water Park in Lyons and the Skokie Lagoon.
-Sport/Concert venues like Bridgeview (Seat geek stadium for soccer), Rosemont (Horizon-Allstate Arena) or Tinley Park Amphitheater.
-Festivals like the Pierogi Festival in Whiting, IN or Irish Fest at Gaelic Park in Oak Forest.
Despite anything read in this article, heed the actions of my friend from Cicero. I don't care if you moved here at the age of 22 and it's been three decades - respect your elders. But if you are going to cross that line, and claim to be a Chicagoan, be humble and show some deference.